Chapter 11: Who Exactly Are You?
After an hour of acupuncture, Song Ruzhao thought to herself, even the old nurse Rong back then didn’t have it this exhausting!
The major task was complete, time to hang up the needle.
After passing the critical period, Shen Lang remained unconscious for a full twelve days.
That little bird with a tuft of feathers had jet-black eyes, even larger than quail eggs, shaking its beautiful plumage in a way that made one want to pet it twice over.
“Tuft, you think since he’s been unconscious for twelve days, with his stubborn temper, will he only wake up on the twenty-second day?”
The bird wagged its tail and let out a series of farts that filled the room. Since finding its owner, it had been eating quite well.
Song Ruzhao covered her nose, displeased: “Full of gas, and you even abandoned me at Qujiang while taking a dump. No matter how many times I time-traveled, I end up here as an imbecile.”
The bird looked utterly confused by her scolding. Bored, she fiddled with her time-travel bracelet and repeatedly shouted “Connect to a human agent” dozens of times before finally getting a response. The other side arrived late.
As soon as the call connected, even before she could speak, an interminable yawn came through.
A lazy voice slowly sounded: “Welcome to the Sixth-Dimensional Time-Space Tourism Bureau. I am your customer service representative: Xiao Liu Still Asleep. To ensure service quality, this call will be recorded.”
Song Ruzhao bombarded them: “Isn’t this the Gan Ye Temple? The contract clearly said I’m supposed to go to the glorious Tang Dynasty, who wants to go to this poor, mid-Tang era? What’s with Tuft? It can’t even recognize the way! Call Tuft to carry me to find Empress Wu Zetian immediately, I’m really angry!”
“Please don’t—” The words had barely begun when another yawn interrupted.
Song Ruzhao refused to back down: “Why shouldn’t I be angry? I want to be very angry!”
Xiao Liu Still Asleep: ?? I just yawned, who told her to be angry? This lousy shift is hopeless!
“Please do not insult our Sixth Dimension’s divine bird!” Xiao Liu emphasized the last phrase with weight.
“It comes from ancient times, named Chongming, with a bird age of five thousand years, having accompanied countless time travelers through joyful journeys. It is our company’s top-performing bird.”
“After this, it’s probably going to lose its ranking,” Song Ruzhao couldn’t help but complain. “Tell it to carry me quickly to Gan Ye Temple, maybe that’ll make up for it.”
“Please wait, I will first verify your contract.”
“Do it quickly, I can’t wait one bit.”
After some hold music, the reply came: “Upon verification, due to a time-space malfunction, your travel destination has changed. The current destination is the result of mutual selection.”
“Nonsense! I clearly said ‘no binding’ that day, but the system selectively ignored me. What choice did I have?”
“I want to re-submit my request—”
The response was blunt: “Each time-space comes with associated system tasks. You have activated the ‘Save My Emperor’ mission, which cannot be changed. You must save all emperors before completing the mission and retiring. Otherwise, a time-space disorder will be triggered with a 100% risk factor, and you will be trapped in the time tunnel, turning to ashes.”
“...” No more. If you keep spouting these tyrannical terms, they’ll spill out of the screen.
Taking a hard line, Song Ruzhao’s reply was equally stiff: “First, your system malfunction caused me to miss my destination. Second, when you asked if I accepted the destination, your so-called intelligent agent was obviously not very smart, and its choice does not represent mine. Third, your company failed to uphold the contract and endangered my personal safety. Wait, I will definitely sue you!”
“Once the move is made, no regrets, no changes allowed. The Sixth-Dimensional Time-Space Tourism Bureau reserves the right to interpret this activity. Friendly reminder: don’t talk nonsense. Our company specializes in suing for defamation, and every case is a guaranteed win.”
“...”
Though the dream of strategizing alongside the empress and stirring the realm with stirring words had shattered, for now, at least she could cling to the emperor’s lap. Under the roof, one must bow; better that than being homeless and on the run in the modern world.
“Then, for the ‘Save My Emperor’ mission, what if the emperor still gets killed by eunuchs?”
Xiao Liu Still Asleep: “Just ensure the emperor dies a natural death. If you fail, find a way to resurrect him—that won’t count as failure.”
Song Ruzhao: “?”
Xiao Liu, are you even awake? Maybe you should listen to what you’re saying.
She had hoped to join forces to seize the realm, which was now within sight. Alas, conquering is easy; holding the realm is hard.
Gritting her teeth to accept reality, she reluctantly took on the mission but demanded some security: “Your AI knows nothing. How do I call on you?”
“We only work on full moon nights, the fifteenth of each month. Just call normally then.”
“...”
The heroine was so envious she nearly exploded: “Does your company have any job openings?”
“Our customer service representatives, each Xiao Liu, are postdoctoral scholars in temporal management from 985 and 211 universities. After 9,981 days of training, they must pass 7,749 written exams and 3,721 interview assessments, with only the top candidate hired. After this travel experience, you’re welcome to submit your resume.”
Wait, after all that grueling selection, you only hire one?
Suddenly overwhelmed by pressure, Song Ruzhao realized that even the national and provincial exams she took didn’t have so many tests combined.
But this Xiao Liu in front of her was not only lazy but arrogantly so. Is this really your company’s cream of the crop?
Song Ruzhao wanted to complain but had bigger matters to attend to: “If my supernatural ability only fails against one person, what kind of background does he have?”
“Either he’s not human...” The words were almost drowned out by another yawn.
“Or he’s like you, not a normal person.”
“...”
Why is he insulting me again?
Having finished speaking, the other party was eager to clock out: “Service time is up. Goodbye.”
“Hey, I haven’t finished asking! Come back... you lazy Xiao Liu...”
[Owner, good evening. This is AI Xiao Liu Still Asleep. Call on me if needed.]
The response was from the intelligent system.
Song Ruzhao pondered repeatedly over the clue: either he’s not human, or he’s not normal.
She thought, Jusi Fu is human, with consciousness and warmth, able to come and go under the sun unharmed. He’s no ghost.
Then again, he is human—hardworking and obedient, a servant who endures punishment without complaint. No celestial being would willingly seek such suffering on earth.
Since he’s human, then he’s not normal!
A light bulb of wisdom lit up in Song Ruzhao’s mind. Could he be a fellow time traveler like her?
Perhaps only those who have crossed time and space reject her supernatural ability.
Yes! She slapped her thigh. Only those who have traveled through time would have the protagonist’s aura to shine before the emperor, and only those who have traveled would dislike growing a beard!
“I’m a genius with wild imagination, I’ve uncovered the truth!” Song Ruzhao grinned smugly, tossing aside two handfuls of the bird’s feathers and bursting out the door.
She left Tuft wailing in heartbreak. Looking into the bronze mirror, the bird discovered another bald patch and mourned loudly: “My feathers!”
“Bang!” The kitchen door was flung open with formidable force, instantly revealing a shocking, indescribable scene.
Steam from the bath still lingered, the air filled with the fresh scent of soapberries. For this uninvited guest, the atmosphere froze in silence.
Jusi Fu hurriedly wrapped a towel around himself, trying to cover his shame, his eyes avoiding hers like a thief.
Though she was the real thief, her gaze was honest and fixed on his most vulnerable scars, unsure how to express her equal stance toward him.
“You saw it all?” he asked coldly, like snow contained in his words.
“Yeah, you must be in pain.”
They both held their breath, barely daring to breathe, as if the air itself had frozen.
“Then you’re not here tonight to flip my cards, are you?” he said, half-joking self-deprecatingly.
“...” Song Ruzhao shook her head like a rattle-drum toy, she was not so lowly!
Thanks to Xiao Liu’s prompting, she had imagined the reunion scene would be like “country folk meeting country folk, tears shining in their eyes,” then warm tears supporting each other, promising never to part, weathering storms together, and swearing that Chinese never deceive Chinese.
Because of her reckless actions, she felt an unspoken sadness.
“Jusi Fu—”
Her call was loud and firm. He was forced to lift his gaze and meet those burning eyes.
“To make it easier to contact you in the future, I came to ask for something.”
“Say it.”
“Your WeChat QR code.”
“Say that again.”
“Q-R C-O-D-E.”