Chapter 20: Expecting

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Yulan draped a garment over Zuo Li’s frail body, a smile lingering on her face. “Of course, this is because of the Empress’s favor. No matter how cherished a side consort may be, she remains but a concubine with limited status. The matter with Lady Wang occurred not long ago, and Lady Shen nearly lost her life. Now that she has made a mistake, the two young ladies naturally cannot remain under her care.”

Zuo Li smiled gently. “Didn’t you just see for yourself? Those raised by their birth mothers are always cautious when suddenly brought to me halfway through. Their hearts remain guarded.”

The difference between the affectionate “mother” and the formal “mother” was plain to see.

“Children are like that. Suddenly changing places can be uncomfortable, but over time, it evens out.”

Yulan gave it little thought.

“They are all untamed,” Zuo Li raised her brow. With a birth mother present, no matter how good a stepmother was, she could never truly replace her.

Yulan did not dare to probe further, instead stealing a glance at Zuo Li’s expression. Under the flickering candlelight, half of Zuo Li’s face was shadowed, making it hard to discern. Pulling back her gaze, Yulan took a handkerchief and gently wiped the fragrant ash from Zuo Li’s hand.

“With a birth mother around, a stepmother separated by the womb always struggles and gains no favor.”

She seemed to recall something. “Back when I was at home, after my mother gave birth to me, it was difficult to have more children. At that time, there was a maid in the household who had once served my mother, later raised to concubine status. She bore a child.”

Zuo Li’s eyes fixed firmly on the Guanyin statue atop the high altar. Moonlight streamed through the window, bathing the white jade in a pure, unblemished glow.

“My mother, out of old affection, kept that concubine and raised the child close by. But no matter how much my mother cared, that child’s heart always yearned for her birth mother. Later, when I married out, my mother’s health was poor and she passed not long after.”

At this, Zuo Li paused, her memory pulling her back sharply. Her voice trembled, heavy with a lifeless chill. “He actually allowed that lowly birth mother to be honored just like my mother—receiving offerings and the worship of descendants.”

“Truly ridiculous. He trampled over my mother to ascend, yet supported his birth mother without regard for my mother’s dignity.”

The expression on Zuo Li’s face gradually faded, her hand hidden within her sleeve clenched so tightly that the knuckles turned pale.

“How can one son have two mothers?” she said, then abruptly turned and gripped Yulan’s wrist, her eyes gleaming with a sinister light, a bloodthirsty smile curling at the corner of her lips.

Zuo Li’s words were light, yet suffocating.

“Hold on tight. Since Lady Wang cannot conceive, and Lady Shen is so favored, her chances are plentiful.”

Yulan nodded, her lowered eyes shadowed with a chilling gloom.

It was the year’s end in just over a month, and the matter of Lady Gu being confined was gradually fading from people’s minds.

Yet the inner palace could never be calm. Against everyone’s expectations, news suddenly broke that Gu Tan was pregnant, striking like a bucket of cold water and shocking all.

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One could only sigh at the nature of fate. She had just been confined, on the brink of losing favor, and yet now she was with child.

It was known that there were only three children in the Eastern Palace, two of whom were born of Gu Tan. Now there would be one more.

Upon learning of Gu Tan’s pregnancy, Shen Quanyi was still in bed. Her wounds had just scabbed over. Xing Ye had suffered greatly, and Shen Quanyi had arranged for the room to be tidied for her recovery, even requesting Li Qian to assign two maids to attend her.

This was already far beyond protocol; Shen Quanyi knew Li Qian was making an exception for her.

Yet the pale face of Xing Ye haunted her mind.

How utterly innocent she was.

But compared to Gu Tan, it was nothing.

Her hand holding the needle paused, a sting spreading as crimson blood welled at her fingertip.

“Auntie.”

Beside her, Qiu Yue, who was massaging Shen Quanyi’s legs, looked on with concern. Shen Quanyi came back to herself, gently biting her lip, the faint taste of iron filling her mouth. Blood stained the corner of her lips, adding a delicate beauty to her pale face.

The cold winter wind howled outside the window, the glazed tiles softly rattling.

Pulling back her gaze, Shen Quanyi twisted her mouth into a bitter smile and set down the fine embroidery. She raised a hand to cover her lips and coughed a few times. “What else can be done? Drag me along in this battle?”

Her throat was dry. Qiu Yue turned to fetch a teapot from the table and poured a cup of tea, handing it over. Warm water soothed her throat and eased the discomfort.

“It’s so late, the Crown Prince probably won’t come. Let’s clear everything away.”

Glancing at the untouched meal on the table, Shen Quanyi felt no appetite. A surge of nameless fury rose within her.

These past days, while nursing her wounds, Li Qian had accompanied her after court every day, but never like today.

No news, no visits for so long.

“You little villain, if I don’t come, you won’t eat properly,” a familiar voice came from the door. Turning, Shen Quanyi saw Li Qian enter. He had grown thinner from constantly guarding her.

His raven-black hair tied neatly, wearing a simple yet elegant robe that accentuated his graceful figure. His gentle and deep black eyes fixed on her with warmth and tenderness. Seeing her attempt to rise, he quickly stepped forward and pressed her back down.

“Enough, spare me the formalities.”

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Seeing his affectionate and gentle smile in the firelight, Shen Quanyi was momentarily stunned. She reached out and grasped Li Qian’s sleeve, leaning forward to rest her head on his lap, gazing up at his handsome face.

Her hand traced down from his brow, brushing along his high nose bridge. Li Qian bowed his head in response, indulging her every gesture.

Qiu Yue quietly slipped away, heartened. The Crown Prince valued Shen Quanyi so much, but Shen Quanyi was still unhappy. She knew about Xing Ye’s situation, yet the Crown Prince had been as kind and devoted as possible.

Why bother? To use one’s favor to drag down a mere servant.

In the end, it might only bring loss.

“Go live outside,” Li Qian said, staring into Shen Quanyi’s eyes. He wiped her jade-like cheek, his low voice tinged with helplessness.

“Why?” Shen Quanyi’s heart surged with turmoil and pain, though her face feigned innocence.

Li Qian frowned. “Gu Tan has always acted without restraint, but now that she’s pregnant and you are still recovering, everything must be quiet.”

“You will accompany me outside while I recover and return before the New Year, by then your wounds will have mostly healed.”

Shen Quanyi stared blankly at Li Qian, blinking. After a moment, she smiled softly, obediently wrapping her arms around his elbow and giggling quietly, “As long as you are with me, I’ll go anywhere.”

Such words were rare from Shen Quanyi, and now sounded especially playful and endearing.

A flicker of joy passed through Li Qian’s eyes. He looked up just in time to see the painting he had made for Shen Quanyi hanging by the window—a beautiful woman smiling warmly at him, her eyes lingering with tender affection.

The red mole at the corner of her eye was strikingly vivid.

Li Qian’s body stiffened slightly, his breath momentarily halted.

But he quickly regained composure.

Shen Quanyi shifted, resting her face against Li Qian’s knees. Her expression softened as her eyes fixed on the lively flicker of the candle on the table. Suddenly, she reached for the silver scissors nearby and cut a piece of the wick. The flame dimmed, gradually fading toward extinction.